It wasn't long ago that I realized that I was, in fact....... A Black Woman. I know that this sounds silly but the whole women part of it is a revelation. All the things that I had read about or had seen my sisters mother, aunts and friends go through I am now experiencing. I t is really hard. How am I supposed to maintain good relationships with God, family, my man, and my friends, do well at my internship- where I just pulled a 10 hour shift, save money in New York City, have a social life, work out- God knows I'm slackin, Figure out what kind of designer I am, Motivate myself and others, Fulfil my responsibility to the community, be socially and Ethnically Conscience and Cute all at the same time. Not to mention I have to fight self doubt complaining, Stereotypes low expectations and being called a racist because I love me some black people. This is really hard.
I never knew why after work my mom would just crawl in the bed - if it wasn't church night that is. It was because she and so many sistahs are tired of the balancing act. Carrying the world on their shoulders, having little time to enjoy life and explore their passions and putting everything before themselves. It's hard most days but I realized how beautiful and strong we must be to be able to do so much. I'm still figurin it out. But so far I have concluded that I love being a Black woman.
I hope you all do too
Love PLBG
shanetta—
ReplyDeleteWhile I don't carry as many burdens as you do in this judgmental world, I do feel your pain on trying to maintain the beautiful facade of being a Woman. We as Women are expected to succeed further than the male counterparts in our lives, and even in 2010, we still struggle to shatter the glass ceiling placed above us. My strength comes from being a feminist, and knowing that at least half of the rest of the globe also fights the same battle as we do. A big turning point in my life was in middle school when I did quite poorly in my classes and I remember like it was yesterday my mother coming into my room in tears (she rarely lets me see her cry) and all she said to me was that, "As a woman, you have to do better." simply because, as unfair as it may be, we have to fight harder to get the same as men. I find strength in my life by knowing that there are VERY successful women in the world, and especially our world, the fashion industry. Although the industry is cut-throat and vicious, on some deeper, more personal level, we as women all bond together-and need to- to prove that we truly are capable of all and any thing we choose to do. We will be successful simply because we have to fight harder to get the same piece of bread. It means more to us because it wasn't as easy to achieve. We must fight to be equal, and I think this paragraph may piss off some self righteous men, when we lay our heads to our pillow, we know inside ourselves that we fought twice as hard that day, that we wanted it more. You can and WILL do what you want, BECAUSE you are a woman, and not in spite of it. You are loved, and I hope that you will find your inner strength, because your beauty is one that the world needs. I'm here for you, as a fellow student, as a classmate, and as a woman, and that will never die.
Thank you Evangeline. Thank you
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