Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Balancing Act

It wasn't long ago that I realized that I was, in fact....... A Black Woman. I know that this sounds silly but the whole women part of it is a revelation. All the things that I had read about or had seen my sisters mother, aunts and friends go through I am now experiencing. I t is really hard. How am I supposed to maintain good relationships with God, family, my man, and my friends, do well at my internship- where I just pulled a 10 hour shift, save money in New York City, have a social life, work out- God knows I'm slackin, Figure out what kind of designer I am, Motivate myself and others, Fulfil my responsibility to the community, be socially and Ethnically Conscience and Cute all at the same time. Not to mention I have to fight self doubt complaining, Stereotypes low expectations and being called a racist because I love me some black people. This is really hard.

I never knew why after work my mom would just crawl in the bed - if it wasn't church night that is. It was because she and so many sistahs are tired of the balancing act. Carrying the world on their shoulders, having little time to enjoy life and explore their passions and putting everything before themselves. It's hard most days but I realized how beautiful and strong we must be to be able to do so much. I'm still figurin it out. But so far I have concluded that I love being a Black woman.

I hope you all do too

Love PLBG

Friday, June 4, 2010

Maturity

Maturity is something that comes with age. Duh. Maturity and responsibility are two things that I struggle to maintain. Once I think I am handling myself accordingly, boom another thing I procrastinated on just pops In my face. When am I ever going to have it all together. The answer is ..... who knows. I hope that one day soon I will have all my shit together. I know that is how many of my sistahs out here feel. The reality is that we are all works in progress. There will be things that we excel at when we first try and there are things that will test our strength ambition and maturity. I am learning that tears are not the answer to every mistake or even a good healing process. We have to learn from our mistakes, not wallow in them. I am growing I swear but it definitely takes some rime, common sence and prioritizing.

Pray for this Po Little Black Girl so that I can become a better women and in return I will do the same for you.

Much Love and learning,

PLBG