Light skin Vs Dark Skin= Division

Hey Yall,
Happy new year. I know I'm a little late but it still counts right. Any who over winter Holiday i heard some disturbing news, yet again another rapper/ public figure reinforcing feeling of inferiority on black women. Little Wayne and members of his camp were rumored to have said something to the effect that they preferred lighter women over dark skin amongst many other heinous statements. Now if this is true I have one thing to say.....
Who gives a flying fuck what Little Wayne and young money have to say about us.Most of them probably don't know where these feelings come from or sadly they don't care. We were programed to believe that we ( and i mean everyone apart of the African diaspora) were inferior in every way from looks to intelligence. Even though many scientific, artistic and cultural movements in America were created by us. Part of the reason why we as a people are not further along is because of the divisions set up during slavery, One that had the most impact was Color.

I personally believe that color issues are more intensified amongst Black women than our male counterparts.Also the pressure to fit our standard of beauty is just as ridged as the European standard. But if one does fit the standard they should not be faulted.The thing is its all bullshit. No one can tell you you are more attactive because you are light skin. No one should have the power to determine if you are less down because you have a yaki flowin down your back. You are the master of your mind. You let in things and there fore you have the power to them out.

It really disturbs me that people still have color preferences, especially in dating. I'm guilty of it. Back in the day I remember saying" I can't date a light skin man, they're too pretty." Or guys who approach my friend who happens to fit the black man's fantasy," you're my type , you are light skin with long hair" Not you're my type you are independent, you graduated from college at the age of 20, you are ambitious, etc. Or another favorite i hear" you are pretty to be dark skin" Is being dark skin a handicap? Is being Light skin a privilege? I guess i was lucky i never have had too fight the battle of being call "White, octroon, Nigga White, Black Cat, smut or spot"

I remember when my sister was getting her Master's, some guy told her point blank he had a color limitation on what his wife would look like. Leaving her out. I think i was too young to understand how hurtful this must have been to her and many other women. To be told you will never be good enough in someones eyes , most hurtful of all that someone is your brother.Or being told by your sister that you are a wannabe. All it does is tear us down and apart. I'm seriously through with this shit I hope it is through with me and I pray that color-ism is expelled from my mind and eventually our culture. I don't want to pass this bull shit down to my children that lie stops here and now.

We are all beautiful because God made us.
Pray for me and you to,

PBLG

Loving Our Sons

Merry Christmas. I hope that every one's was as enjoyable as mine was, surprisingly. There was a nice buffet involved and no arguments. anywhoo back to the reason I am writing this article.
My older sister once stated that in the Black community we raise our girls and love our sons, meaning that mothers are harder on their daughters than their sons. Now this can come from many factors; the first is that mothers love their sons and daddy's love their girls, The second we overcompensate for the way they are treated in society and we try to lift them up all the while ignoring the needs of our girls. Now many may disagree with me with the resurgence of the Black is beautiful campaigns that are springing up everywhere but what about the nurturing that girls need, not just confidence. What about the development of their creativity and helping them be able to measure their self worth not with their looks or accomplishments but with their character.I am not saying that we should not love black men or black boys but we should not give them passes for their mistakes or behavior just because its hard out there.

Now before I go off on a tangent I want to talk about the inspiration for this article, a recent 16 and pregnant left a truly sower taste in my mouth. a young girl who had gotten pregnant had married the father of her child and was constantly disrespected by his family. The father had given up a football scholarship in order to be present in his child's life. Rather than informing the couple about family options at college his family attack the girl verbally by questioning the paternity of the child. Now everyone is entitled to a little resentment, but damn no one placed the blame on the blamee. He was the one who gave up his scholarship not her and they both didn't use protection.

What also stood out to me was that there were no men in the household besides the father of the baby and his younger brother, meaning that these women his mother and grandmother were single parents. These black women tore down another woman of color, even though they new what she was going through, encouraging him to leave and trying to give him an easy out through the paternity test request. They would have him be irresponsible and selfish, and see another woman struggle as they did.

In our community we have a lack of responsibility toward other black women. Because we are taught to pull ourselves up by our boot straps, even if we aren't given boots we must make a way. We will not allow for weak moments or tears or excuses.In the words of the city high song

" if my mother could do it, you can do it"

No I can't. And to you sir if my daddy could raise not only his three biological children but his step daughter and his nieces than so can you. I feel like sometimes we let our men complain about their struggles and ignore our own, or at least push them to the back burner. This is how we raise our children and its not fair. I have news for black men: It is just as hard for me as it is for you out here. I have to prove myself as a talented women, when people make up their minds about me when I walk through the door or read my name. We struggle together so you shouldn't be coddled anymore than me. You shouldn't be excused more than me and you need to learn from the past and not repeat mistakes of your fathers just as I have to not repeat mistakes of my mothers.

We are in this together. All I know is that I will love my children for who they are and try my damnedest not to show favoritism or more tenderness to one over the other. I will love them all with an open heart and with all my might.

somethin to chew on
PLBG

A heavy heart

This Po Lil Black girl is sad right now. After crying for an ungodly amount of time and waking up with puffy eyes I m the one at fault for my misery and no one else. I failed myself. I always knew that failure was lurking around the corner and I just invited it in. I am ashamed of myself and the work that i have done beacuse I am much better.I don't know exactly where ii let myself fall was it in taking too many classes or working or hanging out with my boyfriend, crazy deadlines or am I really just a lazy ragady bitch. I know its a combo of them all. I really feel bad and angry with myself for this but thats life.
I guess i'll be just another Cleveland girl going to Tri-C next semester, instead of graduating. This shit really hurts

Yall please pray for this PoLil black girl
Cause I need it,
love PLBG

Jeffery Campbell just Ruined My Life

Dear friends,
I can't believe it has been so long since we last talked. Now usually I try to look into deep seated emotions or goals, but today I just want to talk about things I want, Specifically a pair, damn near any pair of Jeffery Campbell Shoes. Though they are moderately priced they still are out of the budget of this Po' Little Black Girl. so there fore I have come to the conclusion that Jeffery Campbell and designers in his Market are trying to ruin any chance of me saving a dime. Take a look:





See What I'm saying.
Yall Pray for this Po Little Black Girl, or donate me some shoes for Christmas,

Love PLBG

P.S, I will talk to you all soon

3 goals and foolishness that should have been done

Hey yall,

This Poor Little Black girl is having a time today. It is the first day of my senior year here at Kent State and I am dazed and confused. I am really trying to figure all my classes out, which I should have done in March,(this last minute shit is so passe).Anywho schedule conflicts and brokeness are my two major issues this semester. Should i go with whats important to me or whats easy and will get me outta here on time. I'm confused and I need help.
My 3 goals this year are:
1) 3.0 GPA
This is why I have to get these classes sorted out. I refused to fail or even see a C next to my name once finals are in
2) Make it into senior portfolio
Time management and craftsmanship are going to be my friends- I.E I'm getting a planner
April 16 it's do or die
3)Save enough money to go to Paris ( and then do it)
Get a job, though I have been parlaying today i will apply, apply, apply I deserve Paris

Yall, Please pray for this Po Little Black girl and drop some words of wisdom if you can,

Peace,
PLBG

Grudges

So....

After the last post I got a few interesting comments.My thighs got hot, now only a select few know what that means but lets just say I felt the need to defend my position. Maybe what I said doesn't apply to all BM & WW relationships but you gotta admit it does apply to some. I'm not apologetic for what i said. Though sometimes I can walk down the street and not give two good damns about who's with who, but sometimes I do feel a twinge or find myself wondering why. One comment that I read said that I was holding on to grudges, that I should take a note from MLK and think about Unity. My first mind was to say that I am a Malcolm head so.., but then I stood back and thought, Maybe I am holding on to a grudge.

For those who are free of it and who don't carry the sins of their fathers I applaud you.You are lucky that you don't have to face insecurities and hate embedded so deep within you that you don't know they are there until you read about it or come across certain situations. In 11th grade I took African American History. My mind opened up my relaxer grew out ( at lest the first attempt), and I became very aware of things that I never noticed before.

I never thought I had color issues until I saw a man one day at my Target job the summer after my class, and thought "he is too dark."He looked at me knowing that I was staring and called me sister. I hated myself in that moment. I hated that in me there were thoughts that I hadn't placed there. That somewhere down the line someone said that dark skin, thick coarse curly hair, big lips, big eyes, big noses big butts, big breast were some how not beautiful. Not even human. That in this country we were 3/5 a person that we didn't have souls. that our body was not the American standard of beauty. Even though we have been here since 1619. Black women have to tip toe around our sexuality, Cant go but so far because we don't want to seem promiscuous.You Damn right I got a grudge.

And honestly i am afraid to let go of it. because I fear somehow I would forget my past. My struggle, My people, Myself. It's like this:

Thou art not holy to belie me so; 48
I am not mad: this hair I tear is mine;
My name is Constance; I was Geffrey’s wife;
Young Arthur is my son, and he is lost!
I am not mad: I would to heaven I were! 52
For then ’tis like I should forget myself:
O! if I could, what grief should I forget.
Preach some philosophy to make me mad,
And thou shalt be canoniz’d, cardinal; 56
For being not mad but sensible of grief,
My reasonable part produces reason
How I may be deliver’d of these woes,
And teaches me to kill or hang myself: 60
If I were mad, I should forget my son,
Or madly think a babe of clouts were he.
I am not mad: too well, too well I feel
The different plague of each calamity.


I quoted this monelouge from Shakespeare because it relates to how I'm feeling. I wish i could forgive and forget, but I can't. I can't let go of shit that still affects me. I feel it, see it, think it everyday. So I'm sorry if I have grudges. I'm sorry that the N word doesn't flow as easily out of my mouth as others because some how in some peoples minds it has changed into a non offensive word (side bar I do slip fro time to time). I'm sorry that I may have the occasional internally racist thought. And Im sorry that I may have a problem with a Black Man and a White woman. I don't want to go back to not knowing or not caring or being unaware of my people, not just our beauty, but our true selves. Our sence of community. Our movements. Our beliefs. Our heritage. i know the struggle doesn't make you who you are but it does show you what you are made of. I don't want to lose that.

That's life, and I'm still workin on it
PLBG

Black Men and White Women: Why?

So I been doing some thinking, and admitting and I have to confess that I sometimes have a problem with white women and black men.So I started to analyze why I and so many other black women have this issue. We are told that Black Men don't belong to us, that they don't want to be limited, they are exploring other possibilities, they are curious etc. But the feeling of abandonment, anger, and disloyalty is still there. This is not a new feeling either, though many in the media are blasting it now it has been there. I have heard it all my life.

In the Autobiography of Malcolm X, Malcolm stated that when he walked on the streets of Harlem with a white woman on his arm he was respected and admired. He had the White Man's prize- his precious white woman that he protected at all cost(ie lynching: case in point Emmit Till). The white woman was a status symbol. Many Black women believe the case is the same today. Why is it that so many Black Men's picture of success include a non Black Woman. I once was told that many men in a corporate setting feel that they already stick out enough the are just trying to fit in.

Some Black Men say that dating White women is easier. I have to agree in some way it could be easier. White women don't share a history with Black Men and they have no expectations of them. We expect Black men to be our brother, lover, friend, confidant, protecter, provider, leader, father, son, revolutionary, our everything except Jesus. We approach them in relationships knowing at least some part who they are because we are apart of it. We, as all women carry baggage of past relationships or wrong doings ad we can attach it to the new Black men in our lives. We can push them away when we want them to stay, but are afraid of being vulnerable. We can degrade them by simple quotes like"Niggas aint SHIT." They may not always understand our love and how we express it. They don't know that we yell at them because we are concerned. We don't want them to leave and be out all night, because they may never come back. We love Black men. From the way they walk, talk, smell, their build, their color everything. But the way we express it can push them away.

My boyfriend told me to not look at it as a rejecting to Black women but as a man being curious of what else is out there beyond all he has ever known. He also said that as he and some men were talking about this topic that one said that he did not want to be limited. Now when I hear this I can take it two ways. The first is that when a man sees someone of interest wether she be purple, if he is moved to approach her he will. The other way I can take it is that in some way dating Black women is limiting, That we are not a spectrum of ideas, abilities, looks and personalities. I just don't know what they are thinking but I hope its the first one.

Whatever reason Black Men give, we will never be satisfied. We just cant understand why they don't want us. What's wrong with my milk chocolate, nappy head, dominant featured self. What's wrong with your mother, sister, friend, daughter. Aren't we enough. Haven't we been there through thick and thin.We were down for the movement, up with the people and we created the world with you and still you betray us.


I hope in writing this article that no one is offended, this is all my opinion, and nothing that I'm saying is law. I hope this opens up dialogue and understanding to why we feel the way we do and why Black Men do what they do.


Yall Pray for this Po Little Black Girl and yourselves so that we can get a better understanding and to let go of this unsettling feeling.

Love
PLBG